Sunday, 30 August 2009

A second thought

I don't understand why the issue with time management. I mean, there used to be a point in life when I used to have those spare minutes to spend daydreaming, and now all I'm thinking about is work. My God, I'm turning into exactly the kind of person I would've hated - A hyperventilating wage-slave of the 21st century.

Monday, 17 August 2009

If only men could move to Mars...

I'm only part-feminist - I totally disagree that men are of no use to Planet Earth.

I mean, who would change car tyres, kill lizards, kiss and cuddle, be big and warm when necessary, smell of aftershave etc. if it weren't for the good ol' boys in each of our lives. But then, that's where the fine line exists - right between the aftershave boys and the roadside morons who have no other work but to go around snatching women's bags and pawing girls on the street.

The evening went thus - I walk over to Cascade, this so-so chinese place, right near home for the regular dinner with my colleagues. Then, around 10:30, when there's quite alot of traffic and shops still open mind you, I'm walking back home. Then these two morons, zoom right past me snatching my handbag and pulling me along the road for a good 25 mts. Why would a handbag interest guys so much? I don't know. Unless they're planning to put my mascarra, liners and compact to good use.

Anyway - three stolen debit cards, stolen medical insurance, lost keepsakes, T's wallet, Ipod, Camera, tearful farewell to handbag, two days and a night in the hospital later, I can only say that if the all the world's men moved to Mars and only visited when needed, Earth might've been the bitchiest, funnest, safest planet to live in.

Thursday, 6 August 2009

How to maintain a fine balance between guy friends, girlfriends, and green tea.

I can be a lazy lump of lard when it comes to keeping in touch with everyone I know in life.

Last week, I realized that there's this deal when it comes to serious friend maintainence - the issue of too much and too few. For instance, if I call my girlfriends twice a week - they feel I'm not spending enough time with them, and I call my guy friends twice a week - they start wondering why I'm calling so often.

After a month of relentlesly fixing loose ends with friends and acquaintances of all kinds, I've come up with absolute solutions to solve all friend trouble.

1) If anyone yells at you for not keeping in touch, tell them that they are on your speed dial. It makes them feel important and saves you the time and energy for any further explanation.

2) Once they finish their rant on how you never bother keeping in touch, come up with a sad story (100% works on guys) eg. my aunt's aunt's brother's daughter died. etc. who cares, but you'll get the sympathy vote anyway.

3) I tried calling you 981249693769 times but it said 'you were busy' or not 'reachable'.

4) Blame it on work, and start complaining till their ears bleed. No-one likes it, and they'd probably understand right away.

5) Spam everyone's inboxes with forwards. That way they can never complain that they didn't hear from you. In fact, after a while they wouldn't want to hear from you either. Tch!